Miss Lohan is BAAAAACK!

Y'all know I have a love for Miss Mess--Lindsay Lohan. Well, she was on SNL last week and did great (though I was holding out hope for either a Mean Girls reunion or a Parent Trap 2 skit). Nonetheless it was good seeing her back in the limelight. How long will it last? Honestly, I have no idea, but I hope it lasts... She was my generations Emma Stone or Molly Ringwald.

Check out the video... Lindsay+Real Housewives + Disney + Kristen Wiig = MAGIC

Most Anticipated Films for 2012...

Yup, here it is... And no there is really no need for a lead-in or introduction... Here it goes...

Seriously? Don't be pissed, I was tacky before I didn't introduce my blog posts. I don't need anyone telling me otherwise--after all I'm the guy who plugs Jersey Shore and Paula Dean's diabetes after all. It's not that big of a deal and let's be real y'all could care less about a "tacky" intro anyway. So without further adieu or personal attacks here it goes...

really for sure this time...

The CineMATTic's Most Anticipated Films for 2012... 

10. Dark Shadows- I look forward to almost anything Tim Burton does. He could make a commercial for toothpaste I'd probably pay to see it. Burton reunites with Johnny Depp (have they ever NOT made a movie together?) and Helena Bonham Carter (Seriously? There's gotta be another actress out there right?) in a film based on the cult 1960's  television series. Dark Shadows has vampires, witches, werewolves, ghosts, etc. which all seem right up Burton's creative alley. He should definitely be in his weird, quirky, inky black element. Michelle Pfeifer of Catwoman fame also is back with Burton here.

9. The Great Gatsby- Director Baz Luhrmann has decided we need another cinematic adaptation of this classic literary gem (apparently the Robert Redford version wasn't sufficient?). How will Luhrmann breathe new life into the story? He'll be shooting in 3D! The biggest reason I want to see this is to see if Luhrmann can finally subdue his obsession with spectacle and bring a film with heart and story to the big screen. His past film's like Austraila and Moulin Rouge failed here, but did manage to create indelible images for even casual moviegoers. The good news is he has a stellar cast with Leonardo DiCaprio, Carey Mulligan, and Tobey Maguire. Still, I'm a little concerned about seeing DiCaprio's massive forehead rendered in 3D but I guess that's Luhrmann's problem.

8. Life of Pi- Ang Lee, the visionary (?) director behind Brokeback Mountain and Hulk (the crappy version that didn't have Edward Norton in it) sets out to film what some say is unfilmable. Based on the wildly popular book, Ang Lee has his work cur out for him, but I surprisingly have a lot of faith in him. I've never read the book, but it is one of those that is looming on the reading list for quite some time. The book author Yann Martel states that Life of Pi is intended to make the reader believe in God. I'm interested to see if Lee takes this route or presents the story with more of a dissonance towards the theological themes Martel suggests.

7. The Cabin in the Woods- Joss Whedon produced this horror film promising it would be "...the horror movie to end all horror movies." That's a pretty big statement (kinda like J.Lo's butt in a glittering G-String), but if he can back it up--more power to him. I love scary movies and really hope someone can breathe some new life into the paralyzed genre. After watching Scre4m this past spring, I've started to doubt any resiliency in the genre (not that Scre4m was bad, I actually liked it a lot. It just didn't bring anything new to the table like I had hoped). Whedon is a fanboy's wet dream. Every comic geek from Tacoma to Topeka to Tampa loves him. He is famous mostly for bringing Buffy the Vampire Slayer to television (one thing's for certain Sarah Michelle Gellar's gottta love him). So I mean every geek has faith in him but this horror geek (ME aka Matty) doesn't quite yet know what to think. I guess I'll just have to wait to see this one...

6. The Avengers- Didn't I just mention Joss Whedon? Oh yeah, I sure did. Though he'll be scrutinized for his producing skills with The Cabin in the Woods, it's his directing that will cement his glory among the legion of nerds. Yes, Mr. Whedon (who has never directed a feature film), is tackling Marvel's crown jewel franchise with The Avengers. It's make or break time for both Whedon, but more importantly Marvel. This is THE film they've been trying to make for years, and now they're finally releasing it. It'll certainly be a big box-office draw, but it's unclear as to whether it'll be too many heroes and spectacle to juggle. Will there even be a story? This is maybe not the most anticipated film of the year for me, but it's definitely the trickiest film of the year and possibly the decade.

5. Prometheus- Ridley Scott returns to space and science fiction with Prometheus. This film started as a quasi-prequel to his Alien film franchise. Over time the film evolved into it's own identity with "nods" to Alien. Still, this is NOT an Alien prequel, at least the Fox marketing department wants us to believe. Regardless, Scott has a stellar cast with Michael Fassbender, Charlize Theron, and Noomi Rapace. The trailer looks interesting and really seems to mesh fantasy with fear quite nicely. It kinda feels like a flashback to the sci-fi 80's in fact. We'll see... Maybe Sigourney Weaver will make a cameo too? (Oh, wait this is NOT an Alien prequel--Got it!)

4. Django Unchained- Quentin Tarantino is back. He is such a revolutionary with the unique if sometimes quirky ways in which he tells his stories, that I'm not sure what we'll get out of his latest film. He says Django Unchained is "Not a Western, but a Southern." He is really good at telling us one thing and presenting something completely different altogether. Pulp Fiction and Inglorious Basterds are prime examples as neither was entirely what it seemed. He always has a great cast and this is no different with Jamie Foxx, Leonardo DiCaprio, Samuel L. Jackson, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Kurt Russell, and THE kitchen sink... Okay, I'm joking, but seriously everyone is in this movie and that's not a bad thing--not in the hands of Tarantino.

3. The Master- Paul Thomas Anderson might be the greatest director out there today--PERIOD. Yes, he might be even bigger and actually a better storyteller than Christopher Nolan himself (Nolan fan ninjas descending on blog in 3.... 2.... 1....). Anderson is incredibly adept at telling the American experience through various tales: some strange, some normal, but all universally palpable. His films range from Boogie Nights and Magnolia to the darker There Will Be Blood. He can personify even the most alienating character and manages to always do so with deft dialogue and cunning cinematography. The Master stars Phillip Seymour Hoffman who creates a religious sect after returning from the Vietnam War. Amy Adams and Joaquin Phoenix also star.

2.The Hobbit- Peter Jackson returns to Middle-Earth. He'll have his work cut out for him, but it's Peter Jackson--after all isn't he half Hobbit? I mean, this guy won't let us down, but will have his work cut out for him in bringing the "less-epic" Tolkien story to the big screen. I'm sure some will disagree, but I never found much fun in The Hobbit, but with Jackson behind the lens, I'm quite excited.

1. The Dark Knight Rises- Do I really need to explain? No, I don't think so... If you wanna see some reasons why this is my most anticipated film for the year.... check here and here and here. I think because TDKR doesn't have many words that it deserves a picture... Right?!?



Can't wait... Even If I am a little tacky and a couple people hate me... ;)

Mr. Scott? perhaps...

Aibileen didn't help much the other day... Apparently she isn't really real and can not therefore comfort me at least not physically. I guess the title of her movie "The Help" is just a load of crap--Minnie's sh!#% pie perhaps? Anyway, I've decided I'll turn to the only man who can always muster a smile for me... Michael Scott of Dunder-Mifflin.

Nope, even he's crying... Ugh. Thanks Michael. Anyway, the Most Anticipated Films for 2012 List is coming your way and should be posted late tonight. Look for it (all 6 of you, yes 6 people are actually reading this crap! I couldn't be prouder)...

Now that both Michael and Aibileen have let me down who to turn to next?

L.C.? Kelly Kapowski? Snooki? Ron Paul? Yep, I'm legitimately desperate. Any line with the names "Ron Paul" and/or "Snooki" are bleak at best. Who'd of thought in that lineup or any for that matter that the voice of reason is the 80's teen hearthrob famous for being Zack Morris' on-again-off-again-girlfriend (she was also influential in marketing "mom jeans" to an entire generation).



Yep, this is what it has come too... Cue the Saved By The Bell music... I'm headed to The Max. 

SIGH...  

I Need Me Some Aibileen...

I know. I promised I'd be posting a Most Anticipated films of 2012 list very soon (barring an unfortunate OG breadstick incident). No, nothing happened at The OG, but my life recently has been a mess. There is really no way to explain it, but I guess I could try. It's like if Ke$ha and Mitt Romney hooked up, got loaded Charlie Sheen style, and had a baby together that would summarize my life right now--conflicted and reeking of stale Cheetos and Barbasol (actually that sounds slightly better than my life right now). No, I'm not trying to be dramatic or even melodramatic (some have accused me of that already) it's more that I'm frantic.

You see, I'm tired of meandering through life, hoping today everything will change and be so much better. In fact I'm about as patient as a snow cone in a jacuzzi on a sweltering June afternoon. Sooner or later, something or someones gotta melt. I just hope it's not my snow cone (Tiger's Blood's a bitch of a stain to get out of clothes). It's not that things won't get better...it's that they haven't gotten better. Still... they have to right?

Thanks Brad. But seriously, things have got to get better right? Regardless, I need something, anything really. I haven't slept in a while (I think even the cast of "Up All Night" gets more sleep than me) and feel myself turning into the male version of Joan Rivers--obnoxious, decrepit, tired, and in need of a serious face lift.

Anyway, I write all of this only to say that the list is coming (cue Michael Scott, "That's what she said!"), there's just a lot of "life stuff" getting in the way. Hopefully and through various miracles that'll be the case. (P.S. To those who have been praying for my sister I gotta say thank you again. We appreciate your love and support).

I do finally know what I need. I know it's a stretch, like Katherine Heigel sporting brunette locks and a Jersey accent, but I could really use Aibileen "Aibee" Clark from The Help. I know she'd know just what to say and exactly how to say it. As shown below... 

Yep, If Aibileen could sit me on her lap and tell me this and have me actually believe it, that'd make everything go away (except maybe the Barbasol). Sometimes all we need in life is someone to believe in us even when we don't deserve it. Yes, right now I need that...someone like Aibileen.   

Anyway, 'nuff of that. I'm gonna try and sleep earlier tonight. If that fails, and it probably will just like Rick Perry, then I wonder what movie I'll be watching?

Nolan and 'The Batman Canon'...

The more the weeks pass and the seasons change (Utah’s still waiting on winter), one thing seems to be undeviating at the megaplex--the collective anticipation for Christopher Nolan's final Batman foray in The Dark Knight Rises. The movie has sold out at IMAX theatres in major markets for the midnight showing—and we still have 7 months left. Someone could conceivably conceive a child and give birth days before the film even flickers on the projector. That’s pretty amazing. Further, people actually applaud after the trailer is shown--an absolute rarity of which I have never seen (except when Tosh rips trailers on his show, but obviously that's different). Probably not since the Lord of the Rings trilogy, has there been such "foaming-mouth" eagerness for a film.

Will it live up to the hype is entirely different than can it live up to the hype? And let’s be honest, this hype is something far different than what we generally consider ‘hype,’ even at the movie theatre. Sure there was hype when Kim Kardashian got hitched. There was similar hype when the new iPhone debuted. Yet, none of that compares to nerdgasm of anticipation welling in the minds of comic geeks the world over.

Though Batman Begins was a great film, it wasn’t until The Dark Knight the bar was truly set. Some refer to TDK as the greatest comic book film of all-time. It’s honestly not even debatable. Ledger’s performance, the stunning cinematography, the post-911 sub-text, and the Best Picture snub (Interestingly, the Academy expanded the Best Picture nominees from 5 to 10 after effing Nolan over).

It’s easy to deduce that crafting a film that surpasses its predecessor (TDK) is the real Mission: Impossible come this July. Though it seems all hope is lost, there is hope—which is at least well hopeful. The wild card in all of this is Mr. Nolan who has molded an already epic Batman film duo with Batman Begins and The Dark Knight, and one can only assume that his finale is as good as the near perfect predecessors. I'm also sure that with yet another post about TDKR and Batman all my readers (yes all 4 of you if you count my sister's dog Daisy) are tired of the exhaustive Caped Crusader coverage. I'll admit it, I'm obsessed. But I'm not going to stop; doing so would be the blogging equivalent of asking Paula Dean to abstain from cooking with butter. Yeah, not happening anytime soon.

This blog entry though is about why I think Mr. Nolan is set for not only succeeding, but surpassing previous entries. Yes, I’m honestly going on record saying The Dark Knight Rises will be the BEST Batman film Nolan has made--and really this reasoning comes simply after viewing the trailer. Yet, the reason for such confidence in this statement is simple: The comic book source material.

I’m sure some of you (all 4 of you) are shaking your heads in collective confusion. Let me explain with what my High School art teacher Kristy Carter used to say, “Always, always, always show with image what can’t be said with words." Thanks Kristy, she also taught me to both love and loathe Enya.

As a comic book geek myself, I admit that most of what I say will not be understood—kinda like when I took Calculus in high school (Thank Bob for Mr. Marelli). Nonetheless, and in the words of Batman himself, “stay with me…”

In the comic book realm, Batman and his extensive lore can be boiled down in what are typified as being the “Batman Canon.” Made up of three graphic novels, the canon is influential in covering Batman in three distinct points of his life. The three graphic novels are Batman: Year One, Batman: The Long Halloween, and The Dark Knight Returns.

Batman: Year One, much like the film Batman Begins portrayed Bruce Wayne/Batman in his earliest stages, exploring the “why” and “how” Batman does what he does. Nolan was very influenced by Batman: Year One. It helped set the framework for Nolan's hyper-realistic take on Batman.

          

Even the poster/cover of each work is eerily similar. Further, Batman: Year One and Batman Begins is integral to showing how and why Batman and James Gordon come to trust and work with one

another.

  

Remember this scene in the film, when Gordon tells Batman about the Joker? Well, it actually came from Batman: Year One. It worked so well, Nolan plugged it into his franchise. Batman wouldn't be the same without it...

  

Though the death of The Wayne's is nothing new to Batman lore, it's hard to argue that Nolan didn't entireley rip his scene from the comics. The positions of both Bruce and his parents in each are identical. Each evokes an identical feeling of just how lonely Bruce has now become--a lonelieness that will forge him into The Batman also known as The Dark Knight...

With the sequel The Dark Knight, Nolan turned to Batman: The Long Halloween (Spoiler alert from here out, ye be warned). In The Long Halloween, the mob led by the Falcone crime family hire the villains of Gotham (Joker, Poison Ivy, Mad Hatter, etc.) to do their dirty work and keep Batman at bay. Sound familiar? It certainly sounds like a synopsis for The Dark Knight doesn’t it? Also in the book is the two-faced personality of Harvey Dent, which again is prevalent in TDK. Check the visual similarities below…

  

Though not entirely similar both poster and cover do share some similarities. Notice the blue hues in each.

  

Obviously Nolan and cinematographer Wally Pfister looked no further than the source material for TDK.

 

Yes, Two-Face is pretty much the same in the comics, but in both TDK and The Long Halloween, they're almost duplicates of one another, like those twins from SisterSister Tia and Tamara (seriously, nobody can tell the difference).



Anyway, I think you get my drift. Nolan was heavily influenced by The Long Halloween.

Now comes The Dark Knight Rises, set 8 years after the events of TDK. This makes me think that Nolan will tackle arguably the greatest graphic novel of all time—The Dark Knight Returns. He is literally going for it all--like Charles Barkley at a Krispy Kreme. He’s biting off a lot more than most directors could chew, but remember this is Nolan. I Believe in Chris Nolan. You should too. How could he top The Dark Knight? Well, he’ll start by at least emulating the core canonical source material. Though the film isn’t out yet, we do have the trailer. Check out the similarities...

  

Hmmmmmm? Doesn't that look interesting. Honestly though, neither character is the same. The comic book character is the leader of 'the mutants,' while the other is Bane. Coincidentally, each is a leader of a band striving to overthrow Gotham. When the original pictures of Bane were released, some nerds complained, but if you look at what Nolan might be going for it makes a lot of sense. Even the colors in both images are similar. Could this simply be a mere coincidence? I really don't think so.

  

I'm right, Riiiiiiiggggghhhhhhttttttt?

  

You'll have to look close.. real close, but it seems Nolan is replicating the "worn-out" Batman look found in the comic. Though Christian Bale is sans mustache, they both have a similar frazzled demeanor. Neither looks ready to "save Gotham." They both look flat out wore out and frankly tired. Nolan didn't randomly set The Dark Knight Rises 8 years after TDK  just for kicks and giggles. He did it to emulate what's been done in the comics. Oh, and just a slight possible spoiler, but if Nolan is following The Dark Knight Returns story well be prepared for a funeral in Rises--well kinda. ;)

 

More similarities? Yes, each is THE Batmobile, but look at what Batman's got in Rises...



Okay, I think I've used plenty of proof here to show that Nolan, with his three Batman films, is seeking to create the film version canon of the comic book source material. If this is the truth, I see no way he can't succeed.

Oh, and what about this scene from the trailer? Where could Nolan be "plucking?"



Hmmmmmm? I wonder if maybe this could be where we are also headed?

But that's a subject for another blog and another time. You know this aint the last Batman blog... 

Just a Lil' Break...

Seriously, sorry for the silence the last little while (Again, I know all 3 of you are super concerned about my lack of posting). Anyway, I'll be back and better than ever. There's just a lot of things going on in my life (personal and private) that have taken a lot of time to attend to (and no I'm not talking about my addiction to Jersey Shore which is neither personal nor private). Regardless life takes time and I've been feelin' it lately...

 

Though those personal issues haven't changed drastically, they are becoming increasingly better. Lots of prayers have gone my way and I'm appreciative of those. I'm thankful just that people take time out of their busy days to think of others (especially my family).Which brings me to another point, it's better to be thought of than not at all. Yes, I'm sure even on the bad days Lindsay Lohan appreciates Pitbull rapping about her being "locked up." Riiiigggghhhhhtttt?

Sorry for the mini-rant...
Glad LC has my back... I'm ready to start over again.

Blogging commencing... NOW!

P.S. I have a shameless confession to make... I really miss LC and The Hills. Now all she does is design clothing for Kohl's... sigh

Blogging is my life? Meh. I guess...

It's been brought to my attention by others (at least 3 of you, probably the only 3 who read this crap) that my life is blogging. I'm apparently nothing more than a bot who should be fulfilled simply by churning out web content. This means of course that I'm not supposed to love, be loved, or feel loved. Not to corner it on one emotion (love), I'm apparently not allowed any emotion (positive or negative) at all. Further, I'm also expected to refrain from being social,or even socially frustrated for that matter, and regardless of how sad I feel, my outlet should not be an actual person, but (you guessed it) the blog. Why would I ever want to talk about anything other than movies? Hell, my life needs no expression or vent--I got movies AND a blog. I kinda think that reasoning (finding happiness in my blog) to be a load of steaming crap, but obviously the people I respect (maybe not so much anymore) think otherwise.

Sometimes I just want to talk, like really talk, to someone who really wants to listen, and really cares. But asking for that is apparently impossible--it's simply never gonna happen. There are simple truths in life: Leann Rimes aint eating a Big Mac--ever, the Seaver's won't reunite to make a Growing Pains reunion movie, and Snooki will always love pickles and Juicehead-Gorillas.

And as for me and my simple truth in life?--I will probably never get to really talk and have someone really listen. Oh well. I got a blog.........bitches!    

So, I'll blog... and blog some more...and sling noodles at The OG in between...'cause much like reading Tori Spelling's memoir, this is fun... AND fulfilling (sarcasm very much intended).

Emma take it away...



What a Weekend???...

Kind of a rough weekend... Lost my wallet. BYU lost to Baylor. Got NO Christmas shopping done. Oh, and my Dad was in the hospital (I know, I know, this blog isn't one of those kinds of blogs, but I thought I'd let y'all (all 3 of you) know what's up). As bad as it sounds like it was, it really wasn't. Debit card was canceled before anyone could steal it. BYU's freshman Matt Carlino looks legit (Jimmer legit? probably not but time will tell). My Dad had surgery and it seems like he's doing much, much better( (Even though he may have told a nurse where she could shove the hospital bed and various medical instruments). I also saw Mission: Impossible Ghost Protocol in IMAX with some key friends (Chaser and Maynerd). Review for that movie is on its way very soon. FYI: It's very very good... Anyway, just wantd to say things are gettin brighter and better... (fingers crossed).

Even PaulyD has me sayin...

 

Off to sling 'dem noodles and make some chedda'... Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh BUDDY. 

LMAO...

So y'all know I love me some House music... Techno blasts from my iPod all the time. Kaskade, Calvin Harris, David Guetta, Benny Benassi, Mormon Tabernacle Choir, etc. You get the point, I love that kind of music. It makes me want to pump my fist and bounce with the ladies (No Grenades please). Robyn of 1990's "show me love" fame has faded from the public limelight way before Y2K was still deemed a threat and blond streaks in your hair were considered "cool."

Anyway, Robyn has been resurrected, finding a healthy niche in the house music department. I love her club electro-pop hit "call your girlfriend," but honestly her video is straight up crazy... I mean look at her... her outfit seems to be made of Hamster pelts, her haircut is an anemic Lloyd Christmas knockoff, and those spandex pants look like the fashion results of a one-night stand between Under Armor and Boy George.

Yep, bottom line this video is so ridiculous it could be an SNL skit... No worries, they thought so too. They spoofed it! Check out both videos below and lemme know what you think.


Her version...



SNL's version... LMAO

Seriously.... soooooooooooo funny. 

 

Finals are over... GET. IT. UP.

Yep, finals are over... finally. Not sure how my African American Lit. paper turned out, but by the end all you can really do is grit your teeth and hand it in. Fortunately, my professor and I have one thing in common: love for all things Jersey Shore! She's a guido (wait she's a girl so she'd be a guidette) at heart so I'm hoping all my Snooki references will pay off. Either way, I'm glad I'm done! :) I think this calls for a celebratory dance... Michael Scott... HIT IT!



Even Carlton knows Finals are over... Time to werkkkkk! (or is it twerrrrk) You decide...



Let the blogging commence... 

It's Finals week...

So, to all of my loyal readers (All 2 or 3 of you out there), you have probably noticed a lull in blogging, well this is due in part to my mess of a personal life, but more importantly it's finals week.

This is the time when...

 

Yes, even I am losing my mind currently... But, it is what it is... Couple finals with my clinical insomnia and it has me feeling like this...



To an insomniac... You eventually start seeing the world this way--a blur. Maybe that's why I like Fight Club so much? After all Tyler Durden the narrator can't sleep. I just hope I don't fall asleep during my noodle slinging at the OG... That'd be embarrassing.

Anyway, all of the incredibly well-written film content will return shortly. Promise... Just gimme some time. Things will get better (not only the blog but my life). Y'all be good.

Soap-Box with Mother Monster...

Okay, this blog is devoted to movies. I try my best to provide my insight into Hollywood. Sure, I've wandered here and there (my Britney post wasn't exactly "film" related), but I always try to come back to what this blog is--Cinema, film, movies, motion pictures.

However, in lieu of certain events, I simply had to comment on this--the hot mess music video of 2011.

Lady GaGa has made what she calls a "movie." Check it out below... My thoughts on this "movie" follow the clip. Good luck making it through the entire 14 minutes. And it might not be safe for work.

Okay, so Miss Monster's "movie" goes all allegorical on us, painting broad, strange, and vague strokes (Cheerio bath? really?) that are supposedly representative of her life (Again WTF! A Cheerio bath?). Certainly, I got to give her credit for trying, but at some point her "movie," with it's condescending voice over (that also makes very little sense in relation to her life) comes off more as a pompous statement on her popularity than simply a "movie," her life story as she claims this to be. GaGa completely misses the mark. It's not until the music actually begins (almost 10 minutes in) that the "movie" actually is worth watching. Here the music video feels more cinematic than whatever preceded it. The editing is spot on here, but again only during the actual music portion of the "movie."  

GaGa has simply bit of way more than she can chew--yes she directed this monstrosity. She isn't Spielberg and despite her best efforts she's not even Michael Bay or dare I say Hollywood pariah Brett Ratner. They at least entertains us. Do what you do best GaGa--sing and perform. Entertain through music and spectacle, not "movies." Be the hot mess you were born to be and spare us the life lecture that was about as interesting as an infomercial for Shamwowww. Wear that bloody meat dress, cake your face with extravagant make-up, and bedazzle yourself with glitter and glass shards, but please, please, please, don't ascribe yourself to the mantle of filmmaker. You're not--plain and simple. Calling you a filmmaker is like calling Snooki an actress or labeling Rachel Ray a life coach. 

Shenanigans are what we have come to expect from her. My blog post will certainly not dent her popularity and this "movie" will do little to taint her image. Little Monsters (her devoted fans) are persistent and they'll insure she stays around for awhile.  GaGa is this generations music icon, but when she tries to make herself something she isn't she loses serious points in my book--and fast. Indeed, the woman who preaches being on the edge of glory is creeping (ever so slightly) to the verge of infamy--desperate infamy at that. My advice: Take a lesson from fellow hot messes Brit, Madonna, Whitney, Rebecca Black, or whoever else you idolize this week, and let someone else make your "movies."



Oh, and good job firing your choreographer--Laurieann Gibson . Smooth move. Sure she's a pill, but she's also kinda gold. After all the only tolerable part of the "movie" was her choreography, but it's okay maybe you'll become a choreographer after this too. Because film making worked out soooooo well.

Little Monster hate mail and death threats filling my inbox in 3... 2... 1...

It's Britney's B-day B#@%!...

So, this is totally unrelated to movies, though the Miss Spears was in Crossroads (It was terrible and made Gigli look like an Oscar contender), it's her 30th birthday.

Regardless of your opinion of Britney, her influence on pop culture is second to none. Her performances legendary--The Snake, The Strip, The Kiss, and even The WTF!. Her music, though never groundbreaking, is extremely infectious, making her the greatest selling female of the past decade. She can be identified with one word: "Britney" and quite possibly one letter: "B." Even her words (some insightful, but most inane), have made their way into the everyday vernacular. "I'm not a little girl anymore." "I go through life like a Karate Kid." And who can forget the everpopular, and dare I say trailer-trashiest of phrases, "Go to the Light and see Jesus."

Her rise was meteoric. Her meltdown unprecedented. But it was her comeback that solidified her status in the American subconscious. "Why do we fall? So, we can learn to pick ourselves up."

Love her or hate her she is The American Dream--personified. Though we'd never really want to be her, we can't help but watch her--which is at the root of why Britney is not just a star, but an icon.

 

Happy Birthday Britney... and go ahead and do whatever you want... cause it's your birthday--BITCH!

And I promise... I'll get back to the movies... Don't you dare roll your eyes at me! I WILL CUT YOU! Be patient...  

Pic of the Day...

I had to post this. When I was little my mom used to sit me on her lap and sing "You are my sunshine." I can still remember her rocking me, holding me in her arms, while the tears subsided. There was never a time that I didn't think she could fix any problem--all she needed was that song. This pic makes me wish we could go back to those simple days... Thanks mom.



Wouldn't mind having that on my wall (hint, hint)... Sorry to get all mushy on y'all but I had to share...

Ok, back to the grind.